June 27, 2008

Things have been a little difficult at work lately.  Two of my most respected colleagues are leaving this week and I am sad to see them go.  Also things have been busy and I have not been the best at remembering to eat when I’m hungry which makes for a VERY difficult day for me and anyone who comes into contact with me.  It all blew up last night when I had been hungry all day and then finally had the big hunger crash and snapped at GB.  I do not snap at GB.  That was maybe the second time in our relationships, so you know things are up when that happens.  Anyway, I have resolved to take better care of myself when things are hectic and hopefully this will help with my stress.

My knee is coming along pretty well.  I broke the unwritten rule of athletic rehab and asked my ART therapy doctor what her predictions were for my healing time.  She predicted another month before I’m back to normal.  I’m actually very encouraged by this as it seems like the healing has been so terribly slow.  Of course, she wouldn’t put it in writing for me, but I’ll take what I can get!  I am trying to remember to be thankful that I can run at all and not get antsy and frustrated that I can’t run fast and long.  Really, a month ago I would have killed to be able to run a pain-free 35 minutes.

Sometimes I find it so difficult not to compare myself to other athletes and bloggers.  With everyone’s training schedule out there for all to read, it’s hard to trust in my own sometimes and not wonder why I’m not doing what so-and-so is doing.  This is supposed to be another recovery week for me so it’s even more tempting to want to do more and more and more.  That said, I bailed on my run yesterday because my GOOD knee was bothering me and I don’t want to go through this whole process again for my other knee.  Coach was behind me on this one and there was no mention of a substitute workout.  I was really bummed about missing my run but decided to use the time to attack my financial situation.  So I came home, organized the hell out of my finances, realized things were worse than I had originally thought during my denial period, got frustrated, got angry at myself, got hungry, snapped at GB, and then had a little meltdown.  Just as I was starting to settle in for the evening and get sleepy, I checked my email and there was one from the coach: “Since you missed your run, feel free to go for an hour ride if you want”.  Well we all know that an email like that from a coach actually translates to “I have been thinking about it and you cannot afford to miss a workout today, get off your ass and go for a ride NOW”.  Well, I huffed and puffed and kept looking at my watch and saying “It’s SEVEN O’CLOCK!!  I can’t go for a ride now!!!  I’m SLEEPY” and I sent Coach an email saying “forget it, you are off your rocker”.  But all the while I was walking around the house collecting bike paraphernalia and getting ready for my ride.  So out I went, bitching the whole time about it being late and me being tired.  It turns out, of course, that I had a fabulous ride and it was perfect out with the sun setting and not a single car on the road.  And in the last 10 minutes of the ride I saw two foxes up ahead and managed to get really close to them before they scampered away.  That in itself was worth dragging myself out after 7pm.

Sometimes the thing we need the most is the thing we want the least.  Go figure.


2 Responses to “Foxy”

  1. Beth Says:

    Ohhh…I know what you mean about the hungry thing. It gets ugly when the triathlete hasn’t eaten for a while!! 🙂

    Anyway – good for you for getting out for that ride!! It’s funny how the rides/runs/swims that we REALLY don’t want to do always end up being the best.

    And by the way, I think we all do that thing where we compare our training to others and wonder why we don’t do this or that. That’s the only bad thing about blogs. 🙂 My coach always tells me that’s where confidence and faith come in. We have to do what’s right for US, not anyone else.

    Hope you have a great day!

  2. Oh Ness! Eat will ya? I never forget to eat – sorry your friends are leaving at work, that is never any fun.
    And, trust me….I talk to athletes all day about WHY they are not doing the workouts Bree Wee does….Um….for LOTS of reasons….blogs are super, but they do make everyone WORRY. Beth is right, just have confidence in your plan! 🙂

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